Author: Simon Bodh Nielsen

The more you tighten your grip

You’re all clear, kid. Let’s blow this thing and go home! I call it luck. You mean it controls your actions? I’m trying not to, kid. Don’t be too proud of this technological terror you’ve constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Force. The more you tighten […]

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Don’t trust them

Your eyes can deceive you. Don’t trust them. You mean it controls your actions? I suggest you try it again, Luke. This time, let go your conscious self and act on instinct. I can’t get involved! I’ve got work to do! It’s not that I like the Empire, I hate it, but there’s nothing I […]

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There’s no mystical energy

The more you tighten your grip, Tarkin, the more star systems will slip through your fingers. I need your help, Luke. She needs your help. I’m getting too old for this sort of thing. Kid, I’ve flown from one side of this galaxy to the other. I’ve seen a lot of strange stuff, but I’ve […]

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There’s only one man

He’ll want to use your yacht, and I don’t want this thing smelling like fish. I’m a monster. There’s only one man I’ve ever called a coward, and that’s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I’m calling you is a television actor. No… but I’d like to be asked! Bad news. Andy Griffith turned us down. […]

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Andy Griffith

Bad news. Andy Griffith turned us down. He didn’t like his trailer. First place chick is hot, but has an attitude, doesn’t date magicians. Did you enjoy your meal, Mom? You drank it fast enough. Really? Did nothing cancel? It’s a hug, Michael. I’m hugging you. I don’t understand the question, and I won’t respond […]

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You drank it

I don’t criticize you! And if you’re worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense. There’s only one man I’ve ever called a coward, and that’s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I’m calling you is a television actor. I don’t understand the question, and I won’t respond to it. Say goodbye to these, […]

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Steve Holt

I’m a monster. I’m half machine. I’m a monster. What’s Spanish for “I know you speak English?” Did you enjoy your meal, Mom? You drank it fast enough.

Say goodbye to these, because it’s the last time! I don’t criticize you! And if you’re worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense. Across from where? There’s so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.

There’s only one man I’ve ever called a coward, and that’s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I’m calling you is a television actor. It’s called ‘taking advantage.’ It’s what gets you ahead in life. Whoa, this guy’s straight?

First place

Across from where? I don’t criticize you! And if you’re worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense. I’m a monster. Army had half a day. That’s why you always leave a note! Not tricks, Michael, illusions. Did you enjoy your meal, Mom? You drank it fast enough. What’s Spanish for “I know […]

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Alliance and a traitor

Obi-Wan is here. The Force is with him. What good is a reward if you ain’t around to use it? Besides, attacking that battle station ain’t my idea of courage. It’s more like…suicide. Look, I can take you as far as Anchorhead. You can get a transport there to Mos Eisley or wherever you’re going. […]

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What good is a reward

The more you tighten your grip, Tarkin, the more star systems will slip through your fingers. I care. So, what do you think of her, Han? What!? Alderaan? I’m not going to Alderaan. I’ve got to go home. It’s late, I’m in for it as it is. But with the blast shield down, I can’t […]

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Remember, a Jedi can feel

What?! Your eyes can deceive you. Don’t trust them. No! Alderaan is peaceful. We have no weapons. You can’t possibly… All right. Well, take care of yourself, Han. I guess that’s what you’re best at, ain’t it? I’m trying not to, kid. Remember, a Jedi can feel the Force flowing through him. You mean it […]

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